52 Signs that Jen's Totally Bored...

...she's amusing herself with stuff such as this:

1. The phone rings. Who do you want it to be? SOMEONE OFFERING ME A LARGE SUM OF CASH WITH NO STRINGS ATTACHED. ODDLY ENOUGH, I'VE NEVER RECEIVED SUCH A CALL.

2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart? ALWAYS. I'M A CAPRICORN AND THEREFORE HATE DISORDER.

3. In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener? TALKER. DEFINITELY TALKER.

4. Do you take compliments well? VERY WELL. PILE 'EM ON.

5. Do you play Sudoku? HUH?

6. If abandoned alone in the wilderness, would you survive? YES, BUT ONLY OUT OF SHEER STUBBORNNESS.

7. Do you like nipple rings? ON A SEXY BUFF BODY, HELL YA. ON A SOFT FLOPPY BODY, NOT SO MUCH.

8. Did you ever go to camp as a kid? MY PARENTS WERE FOREVER SENDING ME AWAY TO CAMP. DON'T KNOW WHY.

9. What was your favorite game as a kid? DOES DUNGEONS & DRAGONS COUNT?

10. Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you? PROBABLY NOT.

11. Do you like to pursue or be pursued? TO BE PURSUED, BUT ONLY IF I LIKE THE PERSON DOING THE PURSUING.

12. Any songs make you cry? ONLY WHEN I'M HORMONAL.

13. Are you continuing your education? HOPEFULLY GRAD SCHOOL IN THE NOT-TOO-DISTANT FUTURE.

14. Do you know how to shoot a gun? NO!

15. If your house was on fire, what would be the first thing you grabbed? MY KIDS.

16. How often do you read books? AT LEAST TWICE A DAY TO MY ELDEST SON.

17. Do you think more about the past, present or future? ALL THREE, BUT MOSTLY THE LAST TWO.

18. Favorite children's book? WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE.

19. What color are your eyes? HAZEL.

20. How tall are you? 5' 5"

21. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth? SURE.

22. When was the last time you were at Olive Garden? EW. A VERY LONG TIME AGO WHEN I WAS TOO YOUNG TO KNOW BETTER.

23. Where was the furthest place you traveled today? TO GERRARD AND BACK TO DROP RIDLEY OFF AT PLAYSCHOOL.

24. Do you like mustard? ONLY DIJON-STYLE.

25. Do you prefer to sleep or eat? SLEEP

26. Do you look like your mom or dad? DAD.

27. How long does it take you in the shower? 15 MINUTES MINIMUM.

28. Can you do splits? HELL, NO.

29. What movie do you want to see right now? THE SIMPSONS MOVIE, BUT WILL WAIT FOR THE DVD.

30. What did you do for New Year's? I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER. NOTHING MUCH, THOUGH. WAS PREGNANT AT THE TIME.

31. Do you think The Grudge was scary? YES!! I LOVE THAT MOVIE, THOUGH I'VE ONLY SEEN THE ORIGINAL JAPANESE VERSION.

32. Do you own a camera phone? NOPE.

33. Was your mom a cheerleader? HELL, NO.

34. What's the last letter of your middle name? E. WHAT KIND OF A QUESTION IS THIS? STUPID.

35. How many hours of sleep do you get a night? ABOUT FIVE-SIX HOURS OF UNBROKEN SLEEP.

36. Do you like care bears? IF I COULD, I'D DOUSE THEM ALL WITH LIGHTER FLUID AND STRIKE A MATCH. (EVIL LAUGHTER).

37. What do you buy at the movies? POPCORN ALWAYS.

38. Do you know how to play poker? NO.

39.Do you wear your seatbelt? YES.

40. What do you wear to sleep? UNDIES, MAYBE A BIG T-SHIRT.

41. Is your tongue pierced? NOPE.

42. Do you like Liver and Onions? EWWWWW!

43. Are you in love? YEP, WITH A NUMBER OF FELLAS. ;-)

44. Do you like funny or serious people better? A LITTLE OF BOTH MIXED UP TOGETHER.

45. Ever been to L.A.? NOPE. I WOULD LIKE TO, JUST ONCE.

46. Do you steal or pay for your music downloads? IS THE CIA LISTENING IN?

47. What do you and your parents fight about the most? CAN'T REMEMBER THE LAST TIME I HAD A FIGHT WITH MY FAMILY.

48. Are you a gullible person? SOMETIMES

49. Do you need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy? NO, BUT HAVING A REGULAR SEX PARTNER DEFINITELY TAKES THE EDGE OFF ;-)

50. If you could have any job (assuming you had the skills) what would it be? FILMMAKER.

51. Are you easy to get along with? AS LONG AS I GET MY WAY, I'M COMPLETELY EASY TO GET ALONG WITH.

52. What is your favorite time of day? WHEN BOTH KIDS ARE IN BED.

There. I feel like we've grow a little closer together, don't you? '-)

There's nothing like procreation to make the months of summer speed by at an alarming pace. When was my last blog post, June? Under normal circumstances I'd say that was sheer laziness on my part, but these circumstances are not normal -- they're very, very tired circumstances indeed. Two kids are not twice the work of one, they're ten times.

Both Ridley and Nigel are big, burgeoning and extremely active, and their parents all the more tired for it. Just thought I'd throw a couple of recent photos on this blog, as I've received the occasional request, not to mention the odd complaint or two, from people who are not on Facebook.

It appears that Ridley has poured the entire contents of his juice cup onto his shirt in the submitted photo. Invent your own narrative if you find this one too banal. Ridley after an all-night bender, perhaps? Be creative.